Suicide Sid

What surprises me about this story is that it pictures so well the tendency men have to think that if the get a handful of girls on which to let go of the whole of their desire they'll find happiness and end up like this Sid. That's interesting because gay men actually let all that libido out and allow each other to go for it with each other and the results of it aren't any less decadent. 

So we obviously need to curve desire before desire curves us!

MARCH 29 2004

Thai balcony death-plunge for Suicide Sid?

Every year, hundreds of suicidal farang fellas max out their credit cards and head off to Thailand for a final fling. It's a bit like when kids with leukaemia get sent to Disneyworld - except the rides here aren't suitable for children.

Occasionally, I stop for a drink at a small beer bar off Sukhumvit. One of the regulars there is a quiet English fella called Sid (not his real name) who always sits alone watching the UBC sports channels. For two years we exchanged nothing more than a nod but, one evening, he turned round and said hello.

My surprise soon turned to astonishment. Far from having nothing to say, silent Sid turned out to be very articulate. He was well travelled, knowledgeable and a pleasure to talk to. He seemed a little world-weary but I was still surprised when he calmly said that he planned to kill himself quite soon.

I didn't want to pry into Sid's personal life but it was obvious that things hadn't gone well for him. He had come to Thailand to claim the consolation prize of a massive shag-fest. With plenty of cash in the bank, he had got jiggy with hundreds of Thai women in many interesting combinations.

Now, though, he couldn't be bothered with sex anymore. To add to his woes, a volatile stock-market had left his savings in a worse state than his libido.

"I live in a tiny room, eat on the street and allow myself six Chang beers a night." He explained. "I come here because the owner lets me have the TV remote."

Living like this, Sid reckoned that he could survive for another three years. Sadly, he meant this quite literally. I couldn't really offer him any advice but, by buying him a beer, I was able to extend his life-expectancy by 45 minutes. To ask how he intended to kill himself would have been crass but I'm sure he would have been happy to tell me.

The balcony death-plunge is always a crowd-pleaser but the practice has become so popular in recent years that only the most bizarre cases make the headlines. Last week, theBangkok Post reported how one unlucky farang succeeded only in breaking his arm. In hospital, he was carelessly allocated a bed on a high floor. Needless to say, his second jump was more successful.

Suicide Sid differs from most of these guys in that he lives on his own. His death won't feature the usual sideshow of a rough-looking Thai bar girl squeezing out a few crocodile-tears before asking how much she's going to get.